ARE YOU SABOTAGING YOURSELF?

ARE YOU SABOTAGING YOURSELF? Simply stated, self-sabotage includes behaviors that block you from having the life experiences and results you desire. Sometimes your actions are so subtle you are not even aware of what you are putting into play for your future. As a renowned expert on overcoming self-sabotage in myriad areas of life, I encourage you to read through this checklist and mark any of the actions you feel may be relevant—indeed, feel may stand between where you are today, and where you prefer to “thrive” in the near future. There are signs… you just have to learn to recognize—and counter— them. After all, change begins with awareness. You may self-sabotage your personal relationships if you: • Do not place a priority on yourself. • Put others in front of you so your needs are not met. • Feel resentful and jealous much of the time. • Attract and choose the wrong partners who will cheat on you, betray you, and hurt you emotionally and physically. • Do not surround yourself with quality people (instead you are the top person for personal characteristics of integrity, skills, intelligence, integrity, etc.)—Resulting in your not growing your skills; choosing instead to feel safe. • Do not stand up for your wants, needs, beliefs, and values. • Go along with others to keep the peace. • Are overly loud, vocal, and domineering. • Are too self-absorbed and arrogant. • Do not take the time to listen to another’s thoughts, feelings, needs, or dreams. • Too often feel irritated and angry. • Frequently have arguments, even with people you care about. • Display emotions either too much or too little—as appropriate for a particular event. • Frequently feel sad and unfilled. • Do not have close or long lasting relationships. • Feel shame or guilt. • Feel that you are defective or undesirable.

Mamiko Odegard, Ph.D. Biz Life Success, Inc. 480-398-5600 9375 E. Shea Blvd. Suite 100 Scottsdale, AZ 85260 [email protected]

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Feel unworthy. Are afraid of being abandoned in relationships. Inappropriately disclose too much information about yourself Worry that others will not like or love you. Become a chameleon to have someone like you. Do not allow others to see your true self. Engage in actions that violate your values.

Don’t ignore potential signs of self-sabotage in business, if you: • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Think that no one else can do a task as well as you. Work too much and get too little in return. Feel exhausted mentally, emotionally, and physically from doing too much and not asking for help. Are overly competitive. Do not share information so others will struggle and not outshine your performance. Are too eager to please and being disappointed and hurt when compliments and recognition don’t come your way. Take others for granted. Are unable to fully express appreciation. Find yourself being passive and not finding your voice. Let others dominate rather than speaking up and taking decisive action. Are too frequently overly accommodating. Choose not to go along with what your heart and mind are telling you. Focus on being a perfectionist and finding flaws in yourself or others (never being/doing good enough). Are often judgmental and criticizing self and others.

Don’t be surprised if you sabotage individual performance when you: • Create low energy and motivation due to anxiety and fear of failing. • Experience consistent discomfort that others will discover that you’re not as smart, clever, creative, decisive... or that you’re not the leader they believe. • Continually deal with tasks that are a struggle for you. • Recognize you are not good at closing sales. • Hold erroneous beliefs that you are selling rather than serving your client and making your client’s life/job easier • Fear that someone else will make you look bad, and ultimately take over your position. • You don’t hire or mentor people who are highly skilled, have special technical talents or are highly educated/intelligent. • Procrastinate and not understand the reason why. • Remain disorganized, even knowing its impact on your productivity.


Life can be difficult if you sabotage team performance, when you: • Don’t perform as a team player. • Don’t listen carefully and openly to others’ ideas and visions for accomplishing goals. • Don’t hire the best people due to fears that new person will outshine, work harder, more efficiently, and make you look bad. • Place too much importance on being team leader, or demand others do things your way. • Rule from the fear of being demoted or fired rather than encourage employee loyalty. • Don’t promote employees’/others’ feelings of being safe and appreciated as part of team or organization. • Feel overly threatened, and don’t take the best of the best ideas or give key individuals credit for their contributions. • Have problems with jealousy and competitiveness, hogging attention, or take away from the well-being of a company or team. • Ignore efforts of the team. • Try to look like the hero. • Lose the best employees because people don’t want to work with you. • Build yourself up yet put others down when reflecting on a group effort. Be aware of how you might sabotage leadership and excellence, when you: • Hire people less qualified knowing they won’t shine. • Fail to recognize people who produce quality work and add to the company’s well-being • Withhold vital information from co-workers, and subordinates that prevents their ability to perform their best job. • Take credit for a staff member’s contributions and ideas. • Delegate unrealistic goals that are not achievable. I hope you have enjoyed this checklist, developed a new awareness of just how subtle self-sabotage can be, and make a decision you want to remove self-sabotage with behaviors that do not benefit you or help you achieve what you want most in certain areas of your life. It is possible to have a new you; it is possible to defeat self-sabotage once and for all. Please know my passion is to assist others with a journey to being EXTRAordinary, and that I am always open to having conversations about what the next steps will be. Please feel free to email me at [email protected] and connect with me on social media. Now that I have your interest piqued about myriad ways you may engage in Self-Sabotage, and wondering what to do next, I wanted to make a special offer of an up-coming Teleseminar Series to serve just that purpose. This offer is made only to those who want to ACT on this opportunity immediately. Click http://www.drmamiko.com/overcomingself-sabotage-teleseminar-series/ to link to this unique and timely offer. Mamiko Odegard, PhD www.DrMamiko.com https://www.facebook.com/ACTOnLove/ https://www.facebook.com/BizLifeSuccess/ https://twitter.com/DrMamikoOdegard http://www.linkedin.com/pub/dr-mamiko-odegard/4/b65/140 https://twitter.com/Act_on_love
