move the pick-up game to a drinking adventure at Third Base. Come out and .... Come to the Ref clinic we will be hosting
VOL 1 -WAKA TX LIVE AND CAPITAL WINTER 2011
WELCOME BACK to your favorite activity of the week! We are all so excited to see all of the old and new faces out there on the fields!
Unfortunately this ridiculously rare weather has forced us to move the pick-up game to a drinking adventure at Third Base. Come out and join us for some pitchers of beer and get to know your fellow ballers!
For those of you who are new, this is our weekly newsletter. The next few pages will give you all of the information you need to know about the season, the GMOT, and some fun pages written by your WAKA Austin Board. Please enjoy and submit entries every week so that we continue to rock this newsletter!
We will be at Third Base tomorrow at 7pm. I’ll be in a red KICKBALL shirt so please come by and give me a hug or a highfive. CAN.NOT.WAIT!!! Don’t forget the Captains meeting at 7pm and t-shirt pick-up at 7:30pm NEXT WEDNESDAY at Third Base!
Lots of love and vodka waters,
If you don’t submit, you have a great chance of showing up in the wiener of the week column! All submissions are due Tuesday by midnight of each week. Next week we would love to have everyone submit a bio about their team. What you guys do for fun, how you came up with your team name, awesome things about you, etc.
February 17th - Famous Duos
March 10th - Spring Break '95
April 7th - Super Heroes and Villains
RSVP: http://anyvite.com/rlb9i2oyqc
Name: Lundy – Megan Lundquist Position: Customer Service Representative - TX Live Team: Gobias Industries AND Candy Van Favorite kickball moment: I couldn‟t possibly pick just one and let‟s be honest, I can barely remember most of them. Kickball Drink: Kegstands
Name: Mike Papi Position: Customer Service Representative - TX Capital Team: Relax and Let it Happen Favorite kickball moment: Kickball in Vegas Baby! Kickball Drink: Velvet Elvis Name: Erin “E.Woww” Heekin Position: TX LIVE Presidente! Team: WARRIORS Favorite Kickball Quote: “I had a dream last night. I was a snake... slivering through the grass. I then grew wings and talons and I climbed into the air. I was an eagle... flying over the sea and then I dove... into the ocean... and I swam with the dolphins. I was three animals, joined as one, with the Spirit of the Warrior... which meant... that we would... be victorious on the kickball field tonight. … Welcome back oh sweet Thursday.” – Armand “SparkyCock” Daigle Kickball Drink: that Purple Drank. Boooyah.
Name- Jay Russell Position- Capital President Team- Relax and Let It Happen Favorite kickball moment- It will be winning this seasons championship, after giving it away the previous season. Favorite kickball quote- "Shit on their dreams!" Kickball drink- The infamous Vadorade in the 100 oz mug
Name: Kia Conwell Position: Head Referee Team: Our Balls, Your Face Most Memorable kickball moment: Making a $10,000 call at the Founders Cup in Las Vegas Kickball Drink: Jello shots, because the alcoholics..er kickball players know how to make them right
Name: Manda Mosley Team: Gobias Industries Position: Co-chief/Co-captain of Charity Favorite kickball moment: Every single kickball moment ever invented; especially, this one time on pirate night when Heekin and I walked around asking people to by jello shots for charity by yelling in unison, ”Arrrrrggggncha gonna buy some jello shots?!” How could anyone say „no‟?! We sold out in minutes! Kickball Drink: Vodka Water in the Nalgene…ya know, to hydrunk
Name: Valerie "Cobra Laserface" Gleason Position: co-chief of charity/General Awesomeness Teams: CANDY VAN (Capital) and Gobias Industries (Live) Most memorable kickball moment: Any moment when I was sporting that beautiful unitard and cape combo. Don't worry, I'll be sporting the cape more often this season. Kickball drink: In my I-want-to-hate-my-life-on-Fridays fantasy world, I drink Four Loko. In reality, I drink Lone Star.
Name: Justin "say sumthin" Sansom Position: Social Chair Superstar Team: Untitled Kickball Project Favorite Kickball Quote: "You need to be ready to throw your cig and beer on the gound if you expect to catch a pop fly, come on Say get it together" "Feel the rythmn feel the right give it up it's KICKBALL time!" Kickball Drink: Man Law: Miller Lite
If you see any of us around and have questions or concerns. Let us know! That is what we are all here for!
We will once again require line refs from each team. Check the schedule each week to see if your team needs to provide one that week and on what field. Please make sure that you pick someone responsible who will show up to the field on time and perform their duties appropriately. Failure to do so will result in a paper forfeit for our team. The reason we are requiring this is so that each game has two refs available. The more eyes out there, the less likely you are to be upset about a call.
Why should you be a WAKA Referee?
Reason #1. You can earn VIP status. What is VIP status you ask? You get to start drinking 1 hour before the official start of the mid season or end of season party on the WAKA tab and you get a free “plus 1” to all the parties as well. Do you want to keep the games fair and fun? Then that is the 2nd reason to become a referee. What is another reason to join the ranks of the rules gods? See reason #1. Ok, so now you are sold on at least 2 out of the 3 reasons to be a referee. How do you become a referee? Come to the Ref clinic we will be hosting near the start of the seasondetails to follow. And also ask your local WAKA Rep. Contact Mike Papi (
[email protected]) or Megan Lundquist (
[email protected]) Will I get a really cool and awesomely amazing ref shirt for becoming a head ref? Hellz yeah!
Kia Conwell WAKA Head Ref
#1 Teabaggers- The returning champs are back to defend their crown and for the first time in a decade it’s not Relax. After snatching an 8-peat away from Relax they look to build a dynasty of their own. This group has experience, speed, and a great group of girls, look for them to compete for the crown again. Congrats again to the Fall 2010 TX Capital!!! #2 Relax and Let It Happen- Well all good things come to an end. Relax spent the off-season trimming the fat, healing injuries, and taking steroids. Last season was injury plagued, but fear not their loud mouthed, horribly offensive pitcher will return this season as well as their overgrown 1B. With multiple additions to an already stacked roster, they look to regain their throne. In my mind they are still the team to beat, but I’m sure Tyson thought the same thing after coming back from jail and we all know how that turned out. #3 Walk of Shame- They’ve decided to come home! Like the teenager trying to find himself leaving home @ 18, you found out that TX Live was exactly what you thought, a league filled with costumes and theme parties. Welcome back to the kickball league Walks we’re excited to watch you compete again. Rumor has it that they’ve upgraded in some key positions, combine that with one of the best pitchers in the league (the crafty lefty) and this team will create some noise (and it won’t just be Dre being obnoxious). #4 Candy Van- Last season was their first test in TX Capital and they did incredible. These folks have a catcher and a few others with some serious speed. Combine that with their ability to drink and have fun and that is exactly what TX Capital is about. I look forward to what they can accomplish with a season of experience. Your best bet is to catch them at the 9:15 game cause most of them will be blacked out. #5 Lonestars- Well I don’t even know how to describe this group. It’s like the significant other who’s too proud to apologize despite knowing they are wrong. This team could be great, they’ve got speed, a good pitcher, good defense, yet they refuse to utilize the best strategy in TX Capital kickball, which is bunting. Look, your wieners don’t automatically shrink when you lay down a bunt, trust me I’ve tried it. If they can swallow their pride expect big things, if they can’t, expect another 8th place finish. #6 Awful Waffles- 0 years of kickball experience, SO WHAT!! That’s what this squad of drinkers and athletes said last season. They finished as the #4 seed in TX Capital and then lost to Relax in the playoffs. I’m looking forward to this team improving and helping make TX Capital more competitive. #7 Taking Shots and Drinking Doubles- You tried to leave us, but little did you know, we’d find you. This group of savvy veterans knows how to play the game; if you make a mistake they will beat you. Attendance has been an issue, but if they all show up, look out cause they are one of the top teams in this league, and have been for many seasons. #8 Pitch Slap- New team, don’t know anything about you other than your captains name is Hunter Pence, I’ll just assume he is the same Hunter Pence for the Houston Astros and that’s why you’re 8 instead of 9. #9 Kick into 2011- The name is new and I don’t get it, no humor, no known puns, just flat out confused. Is this 40 year-old dad humor? Regardless, welcome and I wish you the best of luck! #10 Our Balls Your Face- Well Kia your first few attempts at leading a squad haven’t worked out for you, will this be a different year? I’m going to say yes, mark my words this team will not finish last!! #11 Thorzday Ballers- To start out the season last year these ballers were the feel good story, new to the league the sprinted out of the gate, only to falter in the end. My guess is they peaked early and will continue their slide, prove me wrong! #12 What the HTML- I just hope there is some sort of link to a computer company here, either way nerds never fared well on the playground. Hopefully you guys and gals are more like Clark Kent in his superman get up than Napoleon Dynamite hitting a tetherball. #13 Just Kickin It- This is purely a sexist decision, 9 girls 7 guys is not a recipe for success. I hate to say it but it’s true, sorry girls, hopefully some of these teams will take you to dinner before…well you know.
The President’s Picks Welcome Kickballers, I’m your TX Capital Dictator Jay Russell. I will be writing this column for the GMOT this year. Each week I will be making predictions on each TX Capital game and as well as doing a write up and prediction on one designated Game of the Week.
Suck it frogs! Should have never left the Mountain West!!!! Go Lobos!!
Kickball Land How you’ll feel on Friday mornings
King Jay just threw you out of the league.
Kia suggests you stop yelling at the refs.
Princess Lundy loves you long time.
Valerie gives you free candy from the Candy Van.
Papi tempts you to relax with his licorice stick.
That creepy guy who’s lurking by your field waiting to ask you out Gillis Park
Heekin is already green and fuzzy. We don't know what's going on, either.
This infamous award has become a hot topic the past two seasons. It has had some highs (our first girl winner, a repeat winner) and some low’s (someone actually taking the award seriously and getting their hurt feelings). I hold no grudges and have no bias, facts are facts and I present the story I’m told, so if you’re scared of getting this award, all you have to do is act like a normal drunk person instead of pretending it’s your first frat party and mom and dad aren’t watching… Winning this award means you acted like this guy (see picture above) rather than a normal human being. I won’t do this every week, just when that special dude or dudette deserves it, so be on your best behavior kickballers or else…. Also I can’t be everywhere at once so if you see someone actin’ a fool (hitting girls with the ball, being too drunk at the bar, screaming at an official/the other team, or if someone just flat out rubs you the wrong way) please email me the story to
[email protected] Love, “The Mug”
