Overcoming the Fear of What People Think About Me

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Dec 13, 2015 - Do you sometimes struggle with what other people think about you? .... don't have to see the whole pictur
Overcoming the Fear of What People Think About Me

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Overcoming the Fear of What People Think About Me Dr. Brandon Park | December 13, 2015

In this teaching series, we’re studying the three different vantage points of the story of the birth of In this teaching series, we’re studying the three different vantage points of the story of the birth of In this teaching series, we’re studying the three different vantage points of the sto ry of the birth of our Savior. In each of these Gospel stories, we see an angel appear to different people, and the first our Savior. In each of these Gospel stories, we see an angel appear to different people, and the first thing the angel always says is, “Fear not!” Today, we’ll study Joseph and the “Fear Not” message the thing the angel always says is, “Fear not!” Today, we’ll study Joseph and the “Fear Not” message the angel gave to him in Matthew 1. angel gave to him in Matthew 1. Do you sometimes struggle with what other people think about you? At one level or another, we all struggle with wanting to be loved, accepted, and approved of by others. Yet if we’re not careful, we struggle with wanting to be loved, accepted, and approved of by others. Yet if we’re not careful, we can become easily obsessed with what other people think about us. can become easily obsessed with what other people think about us. Joseph had to struggle between doing what is easy and doing what is right, between what people Joseph had to struggle between doing what is easy and doing what is right, between what people would want him to do, and what God wants Him to do. He was engaged to be married to Mary. In ancient times, engagements were different than they are today. It was a binding agreement. If you wanted to break off the engagement, you actually had to file for divorce. wanted to break off the engagement, you actually had to file for divorce. Matthew 1:18, “Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit.” From a human perspective, Joseph is faced with only two options. Either Mary is crazy or she’s lying. To be pregnant out of wedlock was a sin that was punishable by death. Joseph is faced with a dilemma. If he stays with her, then he is marked for life – he may find it hard to get a job. If he divorces her (calls off the engagement), then he may never get married again; no father is going to want to bless his daughter to be married to him. Matthew 1:19, “And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.” Divorcing her quietly was actually a very noble and honoring thing to do. He was not going to expose her to public shame. He was not going to tell everyone, “She cheated on me!” and potentially put Mary’s life and safety in danger. But Joseph was about to learn one of the most important lessons for those who want to honor God: Pleasing God often means __________________________ people. Matthew 20-21, “But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, ‘Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.’” Joseph may have had a pendulum swing of emotions. On the one hand, it’s the greatest honor to have a part in the prophesied Messiah coming to earth. At the same time, he must be wondering, “What are people going to say about me? What is this going to cost me?” As a follower of Christ, you will be regularly confronted with opportunities to either obey God or do something easier to win the approval of people. • Becoming obsessed with what __________________ think about you is the quickest way to forget what _____________ thinks about you. The reality is, for most of us, we drift toward wanting to please people. And suddenly, without even meaning to, we surrender our lives to the opinions of people, at the expense of actually living to please God. How do we overcome that? • Becoming obsessed with what _____________ thinks about you is the quickest way to forget what _____________________ think about you. Living for an audience of one, saying, “God, I want to please You with all that I do,” is the quickest, and best, and perhaps only way to grow past living for the approval of others. When you think about it, you can’t please everyone. If you try to please people, you’re going to fail at some point. To try to please one group of people means you displease someone else. And Joseph was going to have to get to a place in his life where he said, “I value the opinion of God above the opinion of people.” Wayne Cordeiro said, "God turned your ears forward so you'd listen to His __________________ for your future not what people are __________________ behind your back."



How Do We Live for God, Instead of for People?

1. If you’re not ready to be ___________________ for your obedience to God, you are not ready to be ___________ by God.

Think about all of the different ways that Joseph and Mary would be criticized. They would be publicly disgraced, again and again. God’s Word may tell you to do something that is culturally unpopular. And if you obey, you’re going to be criticized. Or you may sense the Holy Spirit leading you to do something. The more you do, the more pain you’ll experience. If you want to make a difference in this world, you will endure more pain than those who don’t. If you want to live a life where nobody criticizes you, let me tell you what to do. Do nothing, stand for nothing, and have nothing. Anything significant you do will be met with _________________ and ______________________.

WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU FACE CRITICISM? John Wooden said, "Whatever you do in life, surround yourself with smart people who will argue with you." Guy Woods has written, "Inasmuch as criticism is inevitable, we must, in order to be happy, acquire an ability to rise above it. He who is overly sensitive to the opinions of others is at the mercy of every gossiper of his acquaintance. Some folks purr like a kitten when stroked by praise; but when criticized, they become resentful, discouraged, and quit. It is highly essential that everyone discover a technique for dealing with the adverse opinions of others, and use it regularly and effectively." Advice for when you’re criticized: 1. _________________ criticism. Realize that the more active you are, the more criticism you will receive. Who catches the criticism? It's the ones who are out there in the middle of things with their sleeves rolled up. 2. Criticism can serve a useful purpose. _______________ from it. Recognize that some criticisms are certainly deserved. Even when critics are unkind and when they exaggerate our failures, there may still be some truth in what they say. So, when faced with criticism, we need to look at the situation honestly and ask these questions: Is it true? If so, how can I overcome the condition that caused it? If not, is there something I can do to eliminate future criticism of the same type? "The ear that hears the reproof of life will abide among the wise. He who disdains instructions despises his own soul, but he who heeds reproof gets understanding." (Proverbs 15:31-32) 3. Having received any benefit we can from criticism, we need to ________________ it. There are times when people will criticize you and the best thing you can do is just to keep on serving God. In a lot of situations, the more you may attempt to answer criticism, the worse the criticism becomes. Paul said, "But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by a human court. In fact, I do not even judge myself. For I know nothing against myself, yet I am not justified by this; but he who judges me is the Lord." (2 Corinthians 4:3-4)

2. Extraordinary acts of God often start with ________________ acts of _____________________.

Think about this: The Savior of the world was born when two teenage kids said “yes” to God, in a simple act of obedience. But the angel only told them a few facts they needed to know: “He’s going to be a boy; you will name Him Jesus; He will be the Savior of the world.” That’s it! No other details on how they were to raise Him? “What else do we need to know?” Sometimes we want God to show us all the details, but He never does. In some instances, if He showed us everything, we wouldn’t take the first step.

We don’t have to understand _____________________ to obey __________________________. We don’t have to see the whole picture to put the first puzzle piece in place and trust God with the rest.

You have no idea what you might _______ into __________________ with one simple, obedient act toward God. How did Joseph respond? Did he do what God wanted Him to do or what people expected him to do? Matthew 1:24: “When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife.” Through that simple act of obedience, the greatest act of God in human history was brought to fulfillment.



Overcoming the Fear of What People Think About Me

1

Overcoming the Fear of What People Think About Me Dr. Brandon Park | December 13, 2015

In this teaching series, we’re studying the three different vantage points of the story of the birth of In this teaching series, we’re studying the three different vantage points of the story of the birth of In this teaching series, we’re studying the three different vantage points of the sto ry of the birth of our Savior. In each of these Gospel stories, we see an angel appear to different people, and the first our Savior. In each of these Gospel stories, we see an angel appear to different people, and the first thing the angel always says is, “Fear not!” Today, we’ll study Joseph and the “Fear Not” message the thing the angel always says is, “Fear not!” Today, we’ll study Joseph and the “Fear Not” message the angel gave to him in Matthew 1. angel gave to him in Matthew 1. Do you sometimes struggle with what other people think about you? At one level or another, we all struggle with wanting to be loved, accepted, and approved of by others. Yet if we’re not careful, we struggle with wanting to be loved, accepted, and approved of by others. Yet if we’re not careful, we can become easily obsessed with what other people think about us. can become easily obsessed with what other people think about us. Joseph had to struggle between doing what is easy and doing what is right, between what people Joseph had to struggle between doing what is easy and doing what is right, between what people would want him to do, and what God wants Him to do. He was engaged to be married to Mary. In ancient times, engagements were different than they are today. It was a binding agreement. If you wanted to break off the engagement, you actually had to file for divorce. wanted to break off the engagement, you actually had to file for divorce. Matthew 1:18, “Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit.” From a human perspective, Joseph is faced with only two options. Either Mary is crazy or she’s lying. To be pregnant out of wedlock was a sin that was punishable by death. Joseph is faced with a dilemma. If he stays with her, then he is marked for life – he may find it hard to get a job. If he divorces her (calls off the engagement), then he may never get married again; no father is going to want to bless his daughter to be married to him. Matthew 1:19, “And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.” Divorcing her quietly was actually a very noble and honoring thing to do. He was not going to expose her to public shame. He was not going to tell everyone, “She cheated on me!” and potentially put Mary’s life and safety in danger. But Joseph was about to learn one of the most important lessons for those who want to honor God: Pleasing God often means __________________________ people. displeasing Matthew 20-21, “But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, ‘Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.’” Joseph may have had a pendulum swing of emotions. On the one hand, it’s the greatest honor to have a part in the prophesied Messiah coming to earth. At the same time, he must be wondering, “What are people going to say about me? What is this going to cost me?” As a follower of Christ, you will be regularly confronted with opportunities to either obey God or do something easier to win the approval of people. • Becoming obsessed with what __________________ think about you is the quickest way to people forget what _____________ thinks about you. God The reality is, for most of us, we drift toward wanting to please people. And suddenly, without even meaning to, we surrender our lives to the opinions of people, at the expense of actually living to please God. How do we overcome that? • Becoming obsessed with what _____________ thinks about you is the quickest way to forget God people what _____________________ think about you. Living for an audience of one, saying, “God, I want to please You with all that I do,” is the quickest, and best, and perhaps only way to grow past living for the approval of others. When you think about it, you can’t please everyone. If you try to please people, you’re going to fail at some point. To try to please one group of people means you displease someone else. And Joseph was going to have to get to a place in his life where he said, “I value the opinion of God above the opinion of people.” Wayne Cordeiro said, "God turned your ears forward so you'd listen to His __________________ promises for your future not what people are __________________ behind your back." saying



How Do We Live for God, Instead of for People?

criticized 1. If you’re not ready to be ___________________ for your obedience to God, you are not ready to be ___________ by God. used

Think about all of the different ways that Joseph and Mary would be criticized. They would be publicly disgraced, again and again. God’s Word may tell you to do something that is culturally unpopular. And if you obey, you’re going to be criticized. Or you may sense the Holy Spirit leading you to do something. The more you do, the more pain you’ll experience. If you want to make a difference in this world, you will endure more pain than those who don’t. If you want to live a life where nobody criticizes you, let me tell you what to do. Do nothing, stand for nothing, and have nothing. criticism resistance Anything significant you do will be met with _________________ and ______________________.

WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU FACE CRITICISM? John Wooden said, "Whatever you do in life, surround yourself with smart people who will argue with you." Guy Woods has written, "Inasmuch as criticism is inevitable, we must, in order to be happy, acquire an ability to rise above it. He who is overly sensitive to the opinions of others is at the mercy of every gossiper of his acquaintance. Some folks purr like a kitten when stroked by praise; but when criticized, they become resentful, discouraged, and quit. It is highly essential that everyone discover a technique for dealing with the adverse opinions of others, and use it regularly and effectively." Advice for when you’re criticized: Expect 1. _________________ criticism. Realize that the more active you are, the more criticism you will receive. Who catches the criticism? It's the ones who are out there in the middle of things with their sleeves rolled up. 2. Criticism can serve a useful purpose. _______________ from it. Recognize that some Learn criticisms are certainly deserved. Even when critics are unkind and when they exaggerate our failures, there may still be some truth in what they say. So, when faced with criticism, we need to look at the situation honestly and ask these questions: Is it true? If so, how can I overcome the condition that caused it? If not, is there something I can do to eliminate future criticism of the same type? "The ear that hears the reproof of life will abide among the wise. He who disdains instructions despises his own soul, but he who heeds reproof gets understanding." (Proverbs 15:31-32) forget 3. Having received any benefit we can from criticism, we need to ________________ it. There are times when people will criticize you and the best thing you can do is just to keep on serving God. In a lot of situations, the more you may attempt to answer criticism, the worse the criticism becomes. Paul said, "But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by a human court. In fact, I do not even judge myself. For I know nothing against myself, yet I am not justified by this; but he who judges me is the Lord." (2 Corinthians 4:3-4)

ordinary 2. Extraordinary acts of God often start with ________________ acts of _____________________. obedience

Think about this: The Savior of the world was born when two teenage kids said “yes” to God, in a simple act of obedience. But the angel only told them a few facts they needed to know: “He’s going to be a boy; you will name Him Jesus; He will be the Savior of the world.” That’s it! No other details on how they were to raise Him? “What else do we need to know?” Sometimes we want God to show us all the details, but He never does. In some instances, if He showed us everything, we wouldn’t take the first step.

We don’t have to understand _____________________ to obey __________________________. We completely immediately don’t have to see the whole picture to put the first puzzle piece in place and trust God with the rest.

set motion You have no idea what you might _______ into __________________ with one simple, obedient act toward God. How did Joseph respond? Did he do what God wanted Him to do or what people expected him to do? Matthew 1:24: “When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife.” Through that simple act of obedience, the greatest act of God in human history was brought to fulfillment.