Parenting and Training - McCrindle

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in cohabitation, changes in legal definitions, civil unions and divorce. With a solid definition of the generations behind us, we now move forward to look at the emerging generations in the home, school, workplace and marketplace.

4 PARENTING AND TRAINING ‘Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn’t have anything to do with it.’ Haim Ginott

As the Boomers begin to enter the retirement phase of their lives, a new generation of parents has emerged: Generation X. Called ‘slackers’ when they were younger, the X-er parents, older and more financially secure, are certainly not slack parents. In fact, they have given birth to a generation more materially endowed, educated, planned for and mollycoddled than any past generation. But while the Zeds have been a privileged generation, these children of an information-saturated and increasingly competitive world have not enjoyed the leisurely and lengthy childhood of previous generations. For their parents, the times have added to the pool of parenting concerns and challenges. As of 2010, the X-ers now share the parenting reins with Gen Y. This was the year that the Y-ers began to turn 30 and enter the peak childbearing years. The year 2010 also welcomed the start of a new generation: the Alphas, who will largely be the offspring of the Y-ers. The family has undergone many changes since the 1960s. However, while the following trends show a move

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away from traditional family life, the conventional family unit (or ‘nuclear family’), comprised of mum, dad and kids, is still by far the norm. Although in decline, 45 per cent of all families fit this description, while 85 per cent of couples with children are married.1

Emerging trends in the home Older grandparents

Today’s new parents – the X-ers – are nearly a decade older than their parents were when they had their first child. Not only is this increase significantly contributing to a greater age difference between children and their parents, but it is also increasing the age difference between children and their grandparents – the Boomers. Based on these averages, women and men in the 1960s were grandparents in their 40s while today’s new mothers and fathers will have to wait until their 60s to be grandparents for the first time.2 Smaller families

Biologically, the average woman has around 20 years of fertility, yet in the 21st century most Australian women begin their families in the last quarter of their fertile years. One reason for the fewer number of children per woman today is simply that many run out of time.While we may be living longer, the timeless biological realities have not conformed to our changing social norms. In the 1990s, the average Australian couple called their family complete at three children; today, couples stop at two.3 Around 60 per cent of families with Gen Z children have two or fewer children.4 If we consider the Year 12 class of 2020, more than one in three of the females will have no children in their lifetime.5

Parenting and training

Table 4.1

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Household trends

Median age at first marriage:

1980

2010

F: 22.1 M: 24.2

F: 22.7 M: 29.6

60%

35%

38%

78%

26.6

30.7

90%

46%

2.1

2.0%

There are fewer Australians married as a percentage of population than ever before; however, Australian couples are still in favour of marriage – they are just delaying it. Of all couples, 85% are married, and of couples with dependent children, 90% are married. Percentage of couples who get married in a church: The declining numbers of couples getting married in churches reflects the declining levels of religious affiliation. Twenty-three per cent of those aged between15 and 24 do not identify with any religion, compared with a small 8% of those aged over 65. Percentage of marriages preceded by cohabitation: Cohabitation has increased by 100% since the early 1980s. Median age of mother at birth of first child: The increasing age of first-time mothers is one reason why couples are having fewer children and more are turning to IVF. More than three per cent of all babies are now conceived through IVF. Percentage of mothers aged under 30 when having first baby: Women are starting families later than ever, having fewer children than ever and returning to work after childbirth sooner than ever. Total fertility rate: By the mid-1980s Australia had slipped below replacement rate (two children per woman) and now migration, not natural increase, keeps Australia growing.

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Average family size:


1980

2010

5

4

$324

$1000

$60 000

$550 000

185

550

An Australian mother has had, on average, two children. However, an Australian woman aged over 60 has had, on average, three children. Average weekly gross earnings: We are earning three times the salary of 25 years ago but houses cost, on average, eight times that of 1982. Median house price: Sydney was the housing leader by a long way in 1982 where the average house cost $80 000 compared to Melbourne’s $50 000. Weeks of work to buy an average house: In real terms, housing has more than doubled in its purchase cost. Average new mortgage:

$29 000

$318 000*

As house prices have increased so have mortgages. However, today home buyers borrow a far higher percentage of the value of their home than in 1982. *McCrindle Research figures.

For those who cannot conceive naturally, IVF is increasingly becoming an option with more than three per cent of all babies now conceived through IVF, compared to one percent in 1995.6 The ‘sandwich’ carer role

Half of all Australians in their 20s still live in the parental home, highlighting the changed life stages of today. Today’s 20-somethings are delaying the traditional adult milestones of marriage, children, career and mortgage more than ever before, and for the first time an entire generation of parents

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have been approaching their 60s while still providing financial and personal support to their children.7 Because of the delay in adult responsibilities, many of today’s parents have a dual caring role, ‘sandwiching’ them between the need to care for their dependent children and their responsibility to ageing parents. Those sandwiched the most are women, who traditionally have taken on the dominant domestic and childcare role. With more mothers in the workforce, this is changing, but slowly. Females continue to be the primary homemakers and carers, taking responsibility for 71 per cent of all home and childcare duties.8 Working mums

An unprecedented number of today’s mothers are working. In fact, this is by far the norm with just over half (52.6 per cent) of mothers with children under five working, increasing to three-quarters of mothers (77.3 per cent) by the time their youngest child is aged between ten and 14 years.9 Of these working mothers, many are part-time workers, making up 60 per cent of the part-time workforce.10 Balancing family and career is an expectation of most women today. Yet we have noticed a small but sustained trend of women choosing full-time parenting over juggling work and family. There are several drivers of this trend. On average, women today have an extra eight years in the workforce before starting a family and so have greater financial and career security – enabling many to take on the stay-at-home role. Currently the female labour force participation rate is 58 per cent (compared to 72.1 per cent for males). Interestingly, there has been a growing recognition among women that while the working years are growing (retirement age pushed back to 67 by 2023) the years with

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young children are shrinking (as the number of babies per woman declines). There is a trend in women moving back to the full-time mum role for this more limited time. For workers today, there is more opportunity than ever to stay involved in the workplace – even while being a stayat-home mother. In this era of work–life balance, homebased work and self-employment, a growing number of full-time mums are able to juggle additional roles. An entrée for many mums into a stay-at-home role is paid maternity leave, where a three- or four-month scheme ushers in a new lifestyle. Economic downturn and the values realignment

The economic downturn of 2008–09 caused a shift from the rampant materialism of the late 1990s and early 2000s to a time of reprioritising. There has been a change in discretionary spending; from the gym memberships to the private school commitments, many spending priorities were realigned. In this economic climate and renewed DIY culture, Australians took back mowing, dog and car washing and house cleaning. Even though Australia avoided a recession, in the recovery discretionary spend is more limited and Australians are once again trading off a bit of their time for money. Some outsourced jobs are being brought back in-house. Recent research showed that 56 per cent of survey respondents had made significant changes in the way they are living. After the costs are reassessed, many are finding that the second income can equally be reconsidered.


Table 4.2

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Percentage of children in paid care by age

Under three Between three and four

1996 21.6% 59.2%

Today 25.2% 72.8%

ABS Australian Social Trends 2005, cat. no. 4102.0, ABS, Canberra. Table 4.3

Meet the statistical face of Australian youth

Sex

Male

For every 100 females there are 105 males born

Secondary education

Will complete Year 12

75% of young people complete Year 12

Drugs and alcohol

Will experiment with cannabis by age 24 and have had his first beer by age 17

57% of males aged 16–24 have used cannabis at least once, while 72% of males aged 14 to 17 drink alcohol

Tertiary education

Will study technology at university

The most popular pathway from school is university (29.8%) then TAFE (24.4%), full-time work (17.2%), part-time work (12%), and unemployment (9%). There are more tertiary students enrolled in the area of technology (IT, engineering and related technologies) than any other category

Health

Will be overweight at some point in his life

58.6% of Australian males are overweight or obese

Mortality

Will reach his 80s

When he was born life expectancy for a male was 74, although today male life expectancy at birth is 79. Male life expectancy will exceed 90 in the next 50 years

Cause of death

Will die of cancer

The leading cause of death today is cancer – a decade ago it was heart disease

McCrindle Research (2008) The face of Australian youth, , accessed 3 July 2008

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Single-parent and grandparent families

Along with changing social norms has come a 54 per cent increase in single-parent families since 1986.11 Fifteen per cent of Australian families are now headed by a single parent, with 83 per cent of these headed by the mother.12 In the USA, nine per cent of households are headed by a single parent, up from five per cent in 1970.13 Alongside the rise of single-parent families has come an increase in grandparent families (where grandparents are raising their grandchildren). In just ten years, grandparent families have increased in Australia by 100 per cent to 22 000. Half of these families are single-grandparent families, the vast majority of which are headed by the maternal grandmother.14 In the USA, grandparent families are also on the rise. As a percentage of the total population, eight per cent of children (5.7 million) live with their grandparents, of which the majority or 3.7 million live in the grandparents’ home. Of the 3.7 million grandparent caregivers, nearly half (1.6 million) are single, the vast majority being women.15

Parenting concerns and challenges Parents have always had challenges and concerns to deal with in raising their family. While many of these remain, today’s parents have a new set of concerns and challenges to overcome. In our survey of 1000 Australian parents, the three biggest concerns of parents of Zeds were bullying, peer pressure and the negative influence of advertising and media. While bullying and peer pressure are old realities of childhood, the influence of media and advertising is a relatively new but increasing concern of parents in the 21st century.


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In this information age, children are bombarded by all kinds of messages and images, many of which counteract the values their parents want to instil. Attempts at censoring information and images in the interests of young people do not go unchallenged. Here we have an example of a values clash in modern society: the majority view that children should be protected clashes with the article of faith regarding freedom of speech and expression. A more insidious challenge for parents is that adult content is being aired earlier and earlier in the evenings. Quite often today parents have to censor television content long before 8 pm. Parents, quite understandably, feel challenged and undermined by all this. They are no longer guardians of information, as Michael Grose notes, but processors and censors (a role in which, in the light of accelerating technology, they are increasingly impotent). Not only do today’s parents have to battle the negative influences of media and advertising from the home-front (very few opt not to have television and the Internet in their homes), they also have to be aware of its influence through other children. Over a third of respondents said that counteracting the negative influences of peers and television is their biggest challenge as parents of Zeds. Children dedicate 27 per cent of their waking hours to screen time, more than the time spent at school or with mum and dad, adding to this challenge of parents.16 Busy trying to balance their dual responsibilities of work and home, the television and the Internet can be tempting alternatives to other before- and after-school activities for exhausted, time-poor parents. Since the emergence of the Internet and text messaging, bullying is no longer confined to the schoolyard. One

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in four Zeds will be bullied, while, according to the Federal Government’s NetAlert service, 16 per cent of children have been bullied online and 14 per cent have been bullied via SMS.17 Today’s prevalence of MMS, which is similar to texting but incorporates media-rich content like images, is only compounding this problem. Peer pressure has also evolved. With family size shrinking, including extended family, peers (and the media) have replaced older relatives as a source of information, guidance and support to young people.18 This, combined with family breakdown and the widespread use of social technologies (like SMS, social networking services and instant messaging) by young people, leads us to deduce that peers must be playing a more influential role in children’s lives today. A generation ago parents could control what came into the household – even electronically. Television viewing could be monitored and when the phone rang everyone knew about it – including who was on the phone and to whom. In our research, parents often express the feeling of having lost control – from mobile phones buzzing with text messages at all hours to laptops online in the bedrooms. There is nothing new about the influence of peers on the behaviour of children. Indeed of all age groups it is children and teenagers who have the highest social desirability index (a quantifiable measure of the peer influence). However, now peers are not just the school friends from one’s area but the MSN buddies and MySpace friends from all parts of the world, and these peers have an influence that extends well beyond the school day. The peer pressure put on young Zeds to conform to the latest trends is perhaps one of the strongest in this age of consumerism. The most marketed-to generation ever,


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the Zeds watch between 30 000 and 40 000 commercials a year.19 Because the parents of the Zeds are usually financially well off, it can seem easier to relent. Consequently, the average Australian household with dependants owns in excess of 100 toys and one in four families with children spend more than $500 per child per year on toys.20 According to our studies, drugs, followed by peer pressure, alcohol and sexual relationships, were the biggest concerns of parents in raising teens today, reflecting the reality that many teens are experimenting with drugs (see statistics from chapter 3), binge-drinking (35 per cent of teens are binge drinking regularly, 43 per cent occasionally) and having sex at a younger age (average age is 16).21 In today’s world of ‘up-ageing’, adolescence begins earlier. Indeed today’s ‘tweens’ aged 8 to 12 are as brand savvy, fashion aware and peer influenced as yesterday’s teenagers. The often age-inappropriate information to which young people are exposed is one factor contributing to this phenomenon. With adolescence commencing earlier, young people are pushing for independence, are peer-focused, and are engaging in risk-taking behaviours from a younger age and to greater excess. The younger generations are more formally educated than any before them and are set to enter a workforce where they, rather than jobs, are in demand. Interestingly then, when it comes to the future of their children, respondents were most concerned about employment (25 per cent) followed by education (17 per cent), reflecting more the concerns of their own youth. Surprisingly, respondents were least concerned about the physical (11 per cent), spiritual (11 per cent) and mental health (15 per cent) of their children, even though one in

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four children today are obese or overweight, fewer attend church (the average age of an Australian church attendee is 5322) and an unprecedented one in five Australian children will have some form of mental illness.23 Despite the opportunities available to this most educated, entertained and materially endowed generation, or ironically because of them, the prevalence of lifestyle diseases is growing with Generation Z. These medical issues include depression, eating disorders and stress-induced illnesses such as stomach pain, headaches and chronic fatigue. These conditions are all symptoms of the competitive, fast-moving world that this generation of children lives in, forcing them to grow up faster.24 Of those parents surveyed, seven in ten believed it is harder growing up today because of greater pressures. One Boomer male felt that ‘childhood is less honoured than it used to be’ and a female Boomer said that ‘sometimes families miss [out on enjoying close] relationships because there is so much on, particularly for the children’. Sentiments were similar among the X-ers with one female respondent saying she felt that ‘our kids have it very hard today. There is more pressure on them to grow up too quickly with parents being too busy.’ In the early 20th century, it was the working child; by the mid-20th century it was the free-range child; and now, in the 21st century, it is the managed child! The following story highlights this modern-day phenomenon. One X-er mother, who bought a PDA for her son on his birthday, explained that because he was so busy with extracurricular activities, he needed one to learn how to manage his time. The boy was only ten. Poet William Blake’s summary of childhood is becoming fast redundant in this highly organised society:


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To see a world in a grain of sand, And heaven in a wildflower, Hold infinity in the palm of your hand, And eternity in an hour.

With parents facing increasing life complexity and pressures, adult worries have filtered down to children. Home affordability ranks as a top-five worry among young teens. ‘Getting a job’, ‘being successful’ and ‘needing to make money’ also top the list of teen concerns.25 Gen Z children are also serious because of the extra pressures. Being part of a small family has also made them less carefree, as siblings no longer outnumber parents.26 No longer are there 3.5 children to play with in the house – in fact for your average child today there is just 0.8 of a sibling to interact with! Bernard Salt argues that a positive outcome of such pressures will be a more educated and street-smart generation than any before it.27 With childhood ending and adolescence commencing sooner, parents are also having to deal with teenage angst from a younger age – and for longer as more young people delay adult responsibilities until their 30s and live at home well beyond their 21st birthday, as we have seen. For the 21st-century family, the cost of living has become an increasing concern, especially since the economic downturn. Our X-er parent respondents cited financial stress (not being able to afford a home or the basics) as their greatest worry, ahead of terrorism, crime, divorce, road accidents and cancer. Even though our research showed that seven in ten Australians agree that it is harder growing up today given the cost of living, young kids have never been more materially endowed. More children go to private schools, and

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Generation Y & Z: Today’s youth talking about their generation What movies were the most formative for you and your generation? Knocked Up,The Matrix, Hair,Titanic, American Pie movies, Scream movies, Team America, Harry Potter movies What are the brands and fads of your generation? Nokia, Nintendo, Apple, Google, Natural Confectionery Company, LG Comments: ‘Our generation is blamed for a lot of the problems of today, but I think it is our parents the Boomers who are to blame.’ ‘They [the Boomers] were selfish and many of them left their kids to do their job of raising ourselves and our siblings.’ ‘We are portrayed as being more rebellious and less respectful. To me this is untrue. We do things our parents did. I still stand up for the elderly on the bus if I am occupying a seat and there are none left, and I see people my age doing the same all the time.’ ‘We have a lot more control over our parents than teens of past decades.’ ‘Our generation is looked down on by the Builders and Baby Boomers who forget that they too had “crazy” teenagers in their youth and refuse to admit they are prejudiced hypocrites.’


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a two-car family with a four-bedroom home is the norm for 21st-century Australian families. The parents of previous generations are astounded at the X-er parents’ financial concerns, having themselves started their families before buying their first home or achieving financial stability. This generation of mums and dads has high standards when it comes to their children – not to say of course that previous generations of parents didn’t. It’s just that the X-ers are used to comparatively affluent lifestyles and want the same for their kids. For Gen X-ers this has commonly meant postponing the commencement of a family until financial stability is secured, and then stopping at two children in order to maintain their comfortable lifestyle.28 A 30-year-old respondent’s comments reflect a common concern of many X-er parents: My family is classed as middle class, yet we can’t afford food some weeks. My children don’t get all their living needs met – clothes and shoes, haircuts and medicines. I don’t have a health care card and I can’t afford to get prescription medicines for my family so we don’t see the doctor when we are very sick. And things are only getting worse.

Similar sentiments were expressed by a 42-year-old respondent who asked, ‘Where do they get their average wage indication from? No-one I know, that’s for sure.We are working harder longer and not getting anywhere.’ Commonly labelled ‘the cotton-wool kids’, Generation Z are living up to the ‘bubble wrapped’ metaphor. In our parenting survey, the majority of respondents (62 per cent) think today’s kids are over-protected. Experts agree. They

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believe that the Zeds are increasingly a nervous generation because of the fears their anxious parents are instilling in them. Our research shows that X-ers are the most anxious generation of parents, and consistent with this they are being labelled ‘helicopter’ parents, ‘hyper’ parents and, in Sweden, ‘curling’ parents (after the Winter Olympic sport where someone slides the ice puck down the rink and two others energetically sweep in front of it to make a smooth path). Gen X parents certainly have some misgivings about the impacts of this parenting and how different it is from their own carefree childhood which Australian children traditionally enjoyed. Children under ten spend less than ten per cent of their free time outdoors; most of it is spent in front of the computer, television or mobile phone. Our tracking studies show that over the last decade children’s TV time has decreased, but total ‘screen’ time (which includes all the electronic screens in their life) has increased. Increased urban living has also contributed to the sedentary lifestyle of Gen Z. While houses have increased from an average 175 m2 in 1990 to 289 m2 today, the land area has decreased by one-third from 600 m2 to 400 m2 over the same period.29 When respondents were asked to comment on childhood and its perceived dangers, some telling observations were given: • ‘Kids are over protected and stay at home a lot more nowadays. They rarely go out on their own.’ (X-er male) • ‘It’s different from when I was a kid. I’m too scared to let my daughter out of my sight.’ (X-er female) • ‘Growing up today is more complicated. I began to see a glimmer of life to come at eight when the Beaumont


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children went missing. Living in Adelaide then was uncomplicated. No-one even thought evil could be done to children. I had no comprehension of not speaking to strangers.’ (Boomer female) It is fear of strangers and the dangers associated with favourite childhood pastimes like tree climbing and bike riding that has seen once noisy neighbourhoods childfree.30 The warnings of experts and the media have compounded these fears of parents. Parents are now informed that not only do their children have to be wary of strangers (‘stranger danger’), but of trusted persons as well (the ‘danger from within’).31 It is interesting when talking to Gen X-ers about their childhoods to recognise just how much has changed in a generation: from parks devoid of slippery slides, to a childhood without firecracker night, pyjama parties, or even a walk to school. The propensity of Gen X to mollycoddle their Gen Z children is not only because of increased concerns over perceived dangers that threaten children’s safety, but also shrinking family size. All of their eggs are in fewer baskets, and the smaller a family is the more time there is to ‘over-parent’ and the more intense adult–child relationships become. Being older when beginning their family, X-er parents have often experienced failed pregnancies and other difficulties in conceiving their children, many finally turning to expensive fertility treatments. These rough formative experiences as parents have also added to their anxieties and tendency to overprotect their young. Though criticised for being overprotective, ironically X-er parents are also criticised when they allow their children the freedoms granted previous generations of children. So not only are they protective and anxious but also

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Generation X: Today’s mums and dads talking about their generation What movies were the most formative for you and your generation? Dirty Dancing, ET,Top Gun, Lost Boys, Friday the 13th, Saturday Night Fever, Indiana Jones movies, Grease, Star Wars movies, Reality Bites,The Godfather movies, Mad Max, Puberty Blues, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off,The Breakfast Club, Gremlins, Aliens What are the most memorable brands and fads of your formative years? Doc Martens, Pacman, Atari, Commodore 64, Star Wars, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Cabbage Patch Dolls Comments: ‘It does feel like a whole new world today than the one we grew up in. We seemed to have more time to live and just be happy with a lot less.’ ‘I’m proud to be Generation X, the first generation too difficult to define.’ ‘Generation X is the link between the past and the future. We are comfortable with technology yet when we grew up our doors were still unlocked and Michael Jackson was black. We like Creedence and Cold Chisel but don’t mind 50 Cent and Beyonce. In the modern world (especially in the workplace) we are the glue that holds young and old together!’ ‘I feel luckier than Generation Y. We had the awesome original ’80s era – it was fun, the music fantastic and memorable, without all the violent, depressing connotations, not to mention bland and butchered songs that are covered today.’


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experience guilt – whether they give their children the freedom of playing in neighbourhood streets or restrict their outdoor activities to times when they are available to supervise.

Parenting styles and aids Once, Australians referred to parents for advice regarding the discipline of their children. Now it’s a plethora of parenting manuals and experts. ‘Sparing the rod and spoiling the child’ is more than simply out of vogue. Corporal punishment, the prerogative of parents for millennia, is now scorned by many. More than nine in ten adult respondents were smacked as children, and two in three still agree with smacking in certain contexts. However, even among the parents who agree with smacking, there is a low level of commitment to it. Most view corporal punishment as socially undesirable and that there is strong social pressure to abstain from it. Indeed, most respondents stated that for this reason they would not smack their child in a public place. Interestingly, this feeling of social pressure, conflicting choices and insecurity comes right at the time when the amount of parenting advice and number of experts has risen dramatically. One in three parents have sought parenting advice using the Internet, most have read or accessed a book on parenting, and most have read a magazine or publication on parenting advice. Two-thirds of our respondents believe there is less support around for parents today. While there is more parenting information than ever before, there is less personal advice or help. Parents report that they don’t need an expert or another research study as much as they

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need a friend or family member to offer some encouragement and maybe a helping hand. They feel swamped by their busy lives, undermined by advertising and entertainment that targets their children and is at odds with their values, and judged by a society that calls on parents to better control their children while removing some of the tools in their parenting toolkit. Compounding this difficulty is the ineffectiveness of past parenting styles in raising and disciplining 21st-century children. Once parents would have consulted their own parents for advice – now it is increasingly common for parents to seek out peers when they require support or guidance because of the perception that the old methods don’t seem to resonate with their young people. While the days of seniority-specific courtesy and respect, of the positional ‘because mum/dad said so’ have passed, today we extend a mutual respect to each other. It can be taken too far, however, with many parents becoming more like ‘peerants’ to their children. Even in the school setting things are changing. Parents, now increasingly tending to side with their children when there is a discipline issue, once would have sided with the teacher. The younger generations are often criticised for ‘lack of respect’ for elders. Perhaps it is not that they lack respect for them, but that, in this world of technological innovation, there is a tendency to look forward, not back – to look to the future and not the past. Traditionally we have had a society where people looked up to the older generations for authority, experience and leadership. However, a quick look at the media, advertising and our popular culture shows that today it is the young people who are the early adopters, the cultural influencers and the trend leaders. In our youth-


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obsessed culture young people have more influence than ever before. Just as respect for authority figures and sense of duty is typified by the Builders, and distrust of authority figures is characteristic of Gen X and even the Boomers, the idea that ‘it’s only a crime if you get caught’ is a slogan for many young people today. In a study about Australians on the road, 12 per cent of our respondents stated they would consider asking someone they knew to claim demerit points on their behalf. In 2006, NSW alone identified nearly 300 occurrences of false nominations for driving offences.32 Shaped in post-modern times where truth is relative and context, interpretation and individual circumstances dominate, upholding bylaws and regulations is an increasing challenge.

What’s in a name? The fashion of names has changed since the Boomers came into the world. In the 1950s, John was the number one boys’ name (now 90th), Peter was second (now 125th – in 2008 only 27 boys nationwide were named Peter) and Michael was third (now 35th). For girls in the 1950s, Susan was first, Margaret second and Anne was third. None of these three names were among the top 143 girls’ names recorded for 2008. Gen X parents are being very intentional in every aspect of their parenting and one example of this is the unique names they are giving their Gen Z children. In giving their children ‘unique’ names, they are also trying to instil an individual identity – just like everyone else! Unique spelling and differentiated pronunciation of traditional

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names is a growing trend – the use of ‘y’ instead of an ‘i’ has become relatively common, as has the use of ‘k’ over ‘c’ (Jaykob, Lynkon), double letters (Siimon, Chriss) and hyphens (Emma-Lee). Popular celebrities have undoubtedly influenced the trend of unique spelling and names: Nicole Kidman and her child Sunday, Katie Holmes and Suri, Gwyneth Paltrow and Apple, Sean Penn and Hopper, Elle Macpherson and Aurelius, and Jordan and Princess Tiáamii. In Australia we have had: Tayla and Taylah, Brayden, Mikayla, Charli, Kaiden, Jorja, Jayden and Jaxon. Most of the names in the top ten list are relatively new entrants. Eight of the current top ten boys’ names only achieved their prominence during the 2000s, while the remaining two (Thomas and James) are the only survivors of the 1990s’ top ten list. For girls’ names, all of the top ten have emerged in the 21st century. Jack has by far been the most popular boy’s name of the decade (though currently sitting at number two). It is also the number one name for the family dog! In 2008, one in 29 baby boys were named Jack. The obsession with the name Jack is not limited to Australia. While Jack had the most number ones, it was not as popular in Canada (16) and the USA (38) – making James a much more consistent performer across all nine Anglophone countries: Australia, Canada, England, Wales, Ireland, Northern Ireland, New Zealand, Scotland and the United States. Although Ella topped Australia’s list of top ten girls’ names for 2007 and 2008 (with Lilly/Lily taking the top spot in 2009), and was the choice for one in 28 baby girls in 2008, the name Emily has dominated the 2000s with four number ones, two seconds and one third. Each of the Anglophone


Table 4.4

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Top ten baby names across the generations

Builders

Boomers

X-ers

Y-ers

Zeds

Males

John William James Robert Joseph Charles George Edward Thomas Frank

John Peter Michael David Robert Stephen Paul Phillip Christopher Ian

Matthew Andrew David Michael Paul Adam Christopher Daniel Mark Scott

Matthew Daniel Michael Thomas Benjamin James Samuel Phillip Christopher Ian

William Jack Jacob/Jake Lachlan Oliver Thomas Riley Joshua Ethan Noah

Females

Mary Dorothy Helen Margaret Ruth Virginia Elizabeth Anna Mildred

Susan Margaret Anne Elizabeth Christine Jennifer Judith Patricia

Michelle Catherine Kylie Nicole Rebecca Melissa Lisa Belinda

Jessica Sarah Emma Lauren Rebecca Ashleigh Amy Emily

Catherine Helen

Rachel Sarah

Kate Katherine

Lily/Lilly Chloe Isabella Mia Olivia Charlotte Ella Emily Amelia/ Amelie Ruby

Betty

Pickering, D (1999) Dictionary of First Names, Penguin, London, pp. 388–89. McCrindle Research (2008) Baby names Australia 2008, , accessed 12 June 2009.

countries had different number one girls’ names, except for Australia and New Zealand (Ella). However, Emily was the most consistently popular name for newborn girls in the Anglophone countries in 2008. Australia shares six boys’ names and five girls’ names with the top ten lists for Anglophone countries. Australia’s top ten lists most resemble those of New Zealand and the combined list of England and Wales. In North America, names

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The ABC of XYZ

like Jacob, Matthew, Emma, Ava, Madison, Sophia, Abigail and Hannah make it into each of the top ten lists. In the Gaelic countries, names like Daniel, Ryan, Emma and Katie appear in each of the top ten lists.33 The challenge for today’s parents, in these times of great change, is to avoid the traps of the rules-free permissive approach, yet not run to the other extreme of an authoritarian approach which leads to discouraged children. The ideal, nurturing parent is one who is regular in expressing love and demonstrating affection for their child, yet is also clear on defining boundaries and creating a culture of compliance with their child. To effectively deliver in both of these areas is the perennial challenge of parents. Despite the new environment in which we parent, the basic dynamics of parents and children are timeless. Therefore for 21st-century parents, the input of their parents and the sage advice of grandparents has never been as important. In the next chapter we look at educating and engaging today’s students:Y-ers and Zeds.

5 EDUCATING AND ENGAGING ‘The principle goal of education is to create men who are capable of doing new things, not simply of repeating what other generations have done – men who are creative, inventive and discoverers.’ Jean Piaget

Age is no longer a factor in learning. We are all students in this information age. While younger generations are now staying in formal education for longer, older generations are continuing their learning experiences well past middle age. In this chapter we examine the attitudes, issues and outcomes of an entire education system that encompasses infants, children, teenagers and adults. So far we have analysed the group of people who represent the majority of today’s learners: they are our children, our children’s children, our nieces and our nephews, otherwise known as Generations Y and Z. The children of Australia are today’s students and tomorrow’s employees. Today’s preschoolers will be completing primary school in 2019, secondary school in 2025 and tertiary education in the years towards 2030. But what is it that defines this significant cross-section of today’s learners as being different?

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Word Up: A Lexicon and Guide to Communication in the 21st Century by Mark McCrindle. 208 pages. Published by Halstead Press, 2011. RRP $30.00

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The ABC of XYZ: Understanding the Global Generations by Mark McCrindle, with Emily Wolfinger. 238 pages. Published by UNSW Press, 2011. RRP $30.00 From explaining the labels and quantifying the numbers to outlining the definitive events of each generation, the best-selling The ABC of XYZ is a comprehensive and fascinating look at the generations.

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