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HOW DO WE LIVE? At IKEA we want to understand how Aussies live and put this at the heart of everything we do, so we can offer solutions that give everyone a better life at home. So we set out to uncover how everyday Aussie families really live; to lift the roof and explore what life is really like – warts, worries, wonderful times and all. We wanted to know what makes families tick. How is modern life shaping household roles and dynamics? Do kids and their parents share the same opinion about family life? What does each believe about the other and to what extent is this a reality? Our research has identified three key themes: time, family roles and the changing relationship with space in the home. This report confirms a number of beliefs about what parents and their kids want, need and feel. Come with us as we paint a new picture of the Australian family in 2013, challenging a number of myths and commonly held assumptions.
CONTENTS 4
THE SCIENTIFIC BIT
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Finding out what modern family life is really like
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Some interesting results
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TIME
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Life in the egg timer
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Back to basics
11 My time
12 ROLES
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The Satellite parent takes orbit
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Helping hands around the house
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Looking out for parents
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Time for teens
18 Space
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19 My space is your space
LET’S BRING IT ALL TOGETHER
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THE SCIENTIFIC BIT Finding out what modern family life is really like As IKEA, we wanted to discover what really goes on in today’s family life. This meant we needed to peel back the layers and gather results using a range of questions and techniques across families of all shapes and sizes in Australia. So how did it work? A collaboration with experts The first phase of the report involved spending time with ‘opinion leaders’ including child psychologists and mummy bloggers who were able to give us a bird’s eye view of the key themes impacting daily family life in Australia. In-home family visits We wanted to study families in their own homes, both parents and kids individually and as a family unit. We visited a range of different families at home, in order to uncover more insights about how they live. We also asked each family member to complete a diary over the course of a week. Quantitative research This is the stage where we took our observations from the family visits and investigated them further by speaking to 1400 family members all over Australia. We spoke to 500 parents and 900 kids aged between 6 and 16. Our very interesting results Finally we brought all our findings together in this report. We have made this report available for everyone to read on ikea.com.au/timetolive, because we believe that it is relevant to every Aussie family. Best of all, we are asking people to join the conversation and tell us what they think!
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A selection of the diary entries from the home visits
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SOME INTERESTING RESULTS 66% of kids and 73% of adults agree that the best family times are unplanned 45% of kids want to do something they’ve never done before as a family When asked what life without a schedule would be like, 53% of teens and 46% of adults say it would be chaotic, not possible or out of control Half of all teens and parents admit that they’d have to stop and think about how to spend an extra couple of hours of free time
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36% of teens said they’d be willing to watch a TV program they don’t like in order to spend some additional time with their family Half of Aussie kids between 6-11 years of age want their mum and dad to have more fun together 25% of teens want to spend more time cuddling their parents 89% of Australian families either have or aspire to have an open-plan living area
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TIME
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This section reveals an interesting contradiction in Aussie family life. On the one hand we live in a time-poor world increasingly driven by our schedules and to-do lists. On the other hand what we really want is to bring back some of that rich spontaneity and freedom we love. It also suggests the most precious family time is often those moments that could easily be confused for the most inconsequential; those tiny minutes or hours of intimacy hidden amongst the ongoing tick-tock of urban life.
Life In The Egg Timer With increasingly hectic schedules, family life is revolving around a rigorous routine as Australians try to balance the conflicting demands of work, family and friends. In many households, this means operating around a roster or schedule. Much the same way an egg timer’s reassuring tick-tick-tick brings order to a chaotic kitchen, a roster brings structure and a sense of order, efficiency and comfort. Indeed, in some cases, busy schedules are leveraged as urban bragging rights: a form of one-upmanship to get one over the Jones’s.
Australian family life is incredibly scheduled - when asked where they would be next Wednesday at 5 pm, 59% of kids 12-16 and 68% of parents say they know exactly where they will be.
In the face of this jam-packed reality, there is an obvious appetite to balance life’s ongoing routine with greater spontaneity. Indeed, the number one thing parents would like to see more of is the family doing something together that it has never been done before.
However, it seems that many Aussie families are forgetting how to be spontaneous. In the last month, 43% of teens and 43% of parents say they haven’t done anything spontaneous, and 42% and 50% respectively admit they’d have to stop and think about how to spend an extra couple of hours of free time. So entrenched is this egg timer rhythm in modern life, that operating outside of it can be a genuine source of anxiety for some families. In fact, when asked what life without a schedule would be like, 53% of teens and 46% of adults say it would be chaotic, not possible or out of control.
Teens 12-16: Agree Or Strongly Agree 66% Wish they had more free time 53% Wish they could be more spontaneous 66% Think the best family times have been unplanned
Parents: Agree Or Strongly Agree 66% Wish they had more free time 57% Wish they could be more spontaneous 73% Think the best family times have been unplanned
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The good news is that acts of spontaneity needn’t be complex or expensive:
“We cooked a dinner we’ve not made in a while and the whole family chipped in to help prepare and cook.” “Mum came home after work and we just chilled out, made pizzas and watched DVDs - it’s the best family time.” “We went for an afternoon drive as a family into the desert, away from city lights and watched the sun go down.” “We had a sleepover in the spur of the moment” The most enjoyable family moments are often the most simple and intimate. Small, seemingly inconsequential moments, can be just as valuable and memorable as large chunks of time together. Being spontaneous as a family doesn’t necessarily mean booking a big overseas holiday - it can be as simple as spending 45 minutes eating together or playing at the local park. In fact, some of the most cherished occasions are those in which the family is given permission to not do anything: when the egg timer is temporarily stopped and spontaneity is given (temporary) free reign.
Top 10 things Aussie parents would like to spend more time doing 52% Doing something we’ve never done as a family 52% Playing outside 44% Spending time with the family 42% Going to the movies 42% Spending time one on one 41% Talking to children 39% Cuddling children 38% Talking about our day with children 34% Watching my kids play
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“It was at a weekend. I remember the weather was horrible… just really rainy and blowing a gale outside. So we all just stayed inside and watched a movie with the kids. It was great. We didn’t go anywhere or do anything really. But we were all together.”
BACK TO BASICS
My time
When asked what they’d like to do more of, for kids, it’s primarily about going back to basics.
With such a busy and scheduled life, no wonder parents feel the need to catch their breath. This ‘me time’ is often found in some unlikely places; when asked what they’ve done to find a little peace and quiet in their lives, 65% of mums say they’ve made the most of time alone in the shower. Half of all parents say they either wake up earlier or go to bed later than the rest of the house to carve out a little extra time for themselves.
“I would go outside and play on the trampoline, ride my skateboard, read, be active and muck around” “I would want to go and play basketball or tennis at the park with my family or walk my dog down the beach.” “Dance and listen to music!” “Go outside and run around, hit a ball, jump on a trampoline.” “Read a book, chat with my mum, listen to music, and maybe clean up my room.”
Top 10 things Aussie teens would like to spend more time doing 60% Going to the movies 45% Doing something we’ve never done before as a family 42% Listening to music 42% Playing outside 37% Going shopping 36% Going to a concert, play or music event 33% Playing video/computer games 33% Spending time one on one with a parent
47% of Aussie teens are participating in three or more after school activities each week
32% Going to a live sports game 32% Talking about what we’ll do at the weekend
35% say they always feel tired
66% wish they had more free time
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ROLES
Aussie families are evolving and as a result, roles at home are too. Kids are growing up faster, yet becoming independent later and wanting greater say in family decisions. Aussie kids are conscious of parental burn out and many want to give some time back to their parents.
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THE SATELLITE PARENT TAKES ORBIT Working long hours and often bringing their work home with them, there’s a growing trend for one or both parents to feel like they’re missing out on family life. Getting up before everyone else and returning long after the kids are in bed, many dads feel like they’re a satellite orbiting the family, but not always quite part of it. This is having an impact on Aussie kids with 89% of 6-11 year olds saying they wish they had more time to spend with family, 66% wishing they could spend more time with mum and 57% wanting more time with dad.
Kids appear to find ways to increase the quality of interaction with mum or dad. For one teenage girl, for example, trips to the shops with dad became something of a treat because it meant she shared quality time with him in his “happy place”.
“I’m free as a bird and not worrying about paying bills and just going out with friends.”
Unprompted, a quarter of teens told us that they like being kids because they don’t have to deal with their parents’ responsibilities, as the quotes illustrate.
“Living life without having to pay bills or tax or any other stuff adults are always stressed about.” “Just being able to do what I want.”
The top 5 things that kids aged 6-11 describe their parents as Mum is...
“Just being myself, goofing around with my younger sister.”
“Not having to be entirely responsible for myself, yet still having some freedom to make my own choices and mistakes. This way, I can feel responsible for myself while still being able to fall back on my parents if I need them.”
Dad is...
55% Loving
43% Funny
34% Happy
31% Busy
33% Caring
29% Loving
33% Always there for me
28% Silly
28 % Busy
27% Happy
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HELPING HANDS AROUND THE HOUSE Aussie kids are happy to be involved in domestic duties such as helping with the grocery shopping, so that they can spend more time with their parents. There’s also something about doing an activity with parents - over a third of teens say they’d be willing to watch a TV program they don’t like in order to spend some additional time with their family.
What teens will do in order to spend more time with their parents 52% Cook dinner with your parent 48% Help with the grocery shopping 42% Walk the dog 41% Visit relatives 36% Help mow the lawn or with yardwork 36% Watch a TV program I don’t Like 29% Help with the washing or ironing 26% Empty the bins 23% Clean the kitchen 23% Tidy the lounge room
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Younger children are also willing to help around the house to spend time with their parents. Two thirds of 6-11 year olds say they would help tidy up their room and put toys away if it mean they got to spend a little extra time with their parents, 52% would cook dinner and almost one in four are even prepared to empty the bins.
What 6-11 year olds will do to spend more time with mum and dad BOYS GIRLS NET
61% 70% 66%
Tidy room and put toys away
44% 60% 52%
Cook dinner with my parent(s)
32% 52% 42%
Help with the grocery shopping
44% 39% 42%
Help with jobs outside
28% 30% 29%
Visit relatives
27% 30% 29%
Walk the dog
24% 30% 27%
Wash the dishes
23% 31% 27%
Tidy the lounge room
22% 29% 25%
Help with the washing
21% 25% 23%
Vacuuming a room in the house
25% 18% 22%
Empty the bins
18% 25% 21%
Wash the family pet
13% 19% 16%
Dusting
10% 19% 14%
Clean the kitchen
17% 5%
Mow the lawn
11%
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LOOKING OUT FOR parents Teens are also recognising that mum and dad spending quality time together is also important.
57% of kids want their parents to dine together more
TIME FOR TEENS Research indicates that many Aussie teens want intimacy, affection and simple encouragement from their parents. 25% of teens and 39% of parents wish they could spend more time cuddling together, and 33% of teens and 47% of parents wish they could spend more time talking about their day or talking about future plans together, once again highlighting the beauty in connecting simply.
44% want their parents to catch up on the latest movie together and more broadly 42% want their parents to spend more time together as a couple 44% wish their parents would do more things for themselves
How do Aussie teens describe their dads?
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How do Aussie teens describe their MUMs?
55% Funny/Goofy
42% Good at cooking
31% Tired/Stressed
41% Tired/Stressed
31% Smart
35% Funny/Goofy
29% Working too much
31% A friend
25% Fun
27% Fun
24% Strict
27% Pretty
22% Embarrassing
26% Cuddly
22% Good at cooking
26% Strict
21% Annoying
24% Loves routine
21% A friend
20% Working too much
SOME OF MUM’S FAVOURITE SAYINGS
SOME OF dad’S FAVOURITE SAYINGS
“Excellent job”
“Listen to your mum!”
“You’re a goose!”
“Look before you leap”
“Be proud of who you are”
“Everyone has good days and bad days but it’s how you get through the bad days that’s the most important.”
“A family who eats together stays together” “Make your bed, clean your room, I love you!” “Ignore undesirable behavior and be who YOU want to be”
“If you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem” “The 6 “P’s” - Prior Preperation Prevents Pretty Poor Performances!”
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SPACE
This section explores our nation’s open-plan phenomenon and reveals how it is not only shaping the layout of Aussie homes, but increasingly the behavior of the people that live there.
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MY SPACE IS YOUR SPACE Increasingly, homes are becoming less private, with a greater sense that everyone is welcome in every shared space. 71% of Australian families now have an open plan kitchen-lounge in their home and, of the 29% who do not, 63% would like to make their home more open plan. This means that 89% of Australian families either have or aspire to have an open-plan living area. Open plan spaces empower a sense of intimacy even if family members are all doing separate things. Dad might be reading the paper, mum is on her mobile and the kids are playing games. Open plan is emerging as the solution for families seeking both independent interests and a desire to be together. No wonder, then, that open plan becomes so aspirational, with 38% of people without an open plan space suggesting that having an open plan space would help their family to interact more often and 68% saying it would change the way their family lives.
“My house is already open plan. I love it because while I’m cooking I can see the kids playing in their toy room or in the lounge. I feel like I’m with them”
Some examples of these changes are below:
“It would make it easier to hang together without sitting on top of each other.”
Where do you spend time when you are all together as a family?
“Yes! Make one great family room together with all entertainment and a family meal area included.” “We could be cooking meals and talking with the children, while they’re interacting with other family members or friends.”
73% LOUNGE/FAMILY OR TV ROOM
1% OUTDOORS
1% BEDROOM
6% OTHER
1% COMPUTER ROOM
12% KITCHEN
“It would mean the kids could do homework whilst I was cooking and pottering in the kitchen.” “To feel like we’re together and not segregated, and could feel we can still interact with each other on many levels, while I’m cleaning or preparing food/meals then I could still be prominent in my daughter’s world when she is in the house.”
6% DINING ROOM
For families with open plan living, 70% say they spend their time together in this open plan area
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LET’S BRING IT ALL TOGETHER
Our report highlights the emerging rhythm of Aussie family life, showcases how Aussie family life is evolving and illuminates some surprising dynamics underpinning the nation. Juggling work and extracurricular activities, household chores and time with family, Aussies increasingly turn to routine. In a society that values progress and efficiency, household routines create opportunities to squeeze more in, creating a sense of order and control. The smallest fragments of time can be so precious: from grabbing an extra two minutes to relax in the shower to seizing a dollop of time to get creative with the kids. Interestingly, many of us have forgotten how to be spontaneous. Indeed, many people admit to feeling a little anxious when free time becomes available and are unsure what to do with free time: we focus on what we should be doing compared to what opportunities await by seizing the moment. Meanwhile, with home schedules fast filling up, an interesting role reversal is forming in many Aussie homes. Kids and teens are now encouraging parents to carve out more time for themselves. In a society that is striving for greater spontaneity, open plan living is more and more desirable. It creates more opportunities for families to spend time together even if members engage in their own personal interests. Ultimately, open plan enables a more flexible lifestyle, giving Aussie families the opportunity to make better use of their time together.
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This report, accompanied by a video content piece that gives families some ideas about how to make time for living, is available for download from ikea.com.au/timetolive
for more information Visit www.ikea.com.au For media enquiries please contact:
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